Dear 14-Year-Old Me

This blog post is a response to Dear 18-Year-Old Me.

Assalamualaikum w.b.t.

Arifah Husna Badlishah.

Well, first of all, I read this post probably more than five times before my 18th birthday. You should not have had such high expectations from me, DUHHH. In fact, it’s not even my 18th birthday yet but I doubt I’ll have sufficient time to blog tomorrow, so I am writing this now.

Eh budak kecik, kau siapa nak suruh aku buat apa? Ni hidup aku lah! Ngehehehehehe.


1. Where am I now?

I did not get straight A’s for PMR or SPM, but 6 for both. You must be disappointed. The Malaysian school system and I were never the best of friends. But it doesn’t matter, it’s in the past. Furthermore, the concept of rezeki is very subjective. He who is content with little, is richer than he who does not find contentment even though he has everything. I’m in university now, and things are different.

In Form 4, I schooled in Seafield for 5 weeks before shifting to MRSM Alor Gajah. I know, right? *laughing while crying emoji* Oh wait… emojis did not exist in 2011. Ah, whatever. Going to MRSM was undoubtedly for the better.

Alhamdulillah, I do pray five times a day. I avoid Milo kotak at least because I am trying to boycott Israel. I drink Milo once in a few days, but hey, four years ago I used to drink a few boxes of Milo in one day. Pottermore? I don’t think I made it past the second book. It’s kinda hambar, actually. Haha. I am in good health, all praises to Allah.

2. How is everyone?

If you only knew, darling. Mum, Dad, Arif and Aimi moved to Tokyo around a month ago because Dad got a job there. Arif and Aimi will go to international schools soon, and Mum is a freelance translator. I chose to stay here, to be independent and free. Uncle B got married to an Indonesian stewardess – Auntie Ayu – and she is currently three months pregnant. He surveyed cots and strollers as if he was buying a new car. Nabilah and Ammar do go to private school and as a result of that they still are not fluent in Malay. Auntie and Uncle Nan took me out last weekend to this awesome recreation / sports park called Serama Camp. Grandpa and Grandma are going to Cambodia soon InsyaAllah. Tok Wan is struggling with the condition of his leg. Wo Tom left us back in January. Everyone else is fine, alive, and well.

3. What university/college (and course) am I in?

I am now pursuing my diploma in Mass Communication in UiTM Lendu, Melaka. What even is a diploma??? Ah, you’ll find out… like… six months before you turn eighteen. Hahaha. No, I am not doing A-Levels or whatever, and I have never once imagined myself in a public university, but my plan for now is to score super-duper well and get a scholarship to study overseas. And this time, I truly mean it and I can actually visualize it in my mind – trust me, it’s different from the sudden burst of energy that makes me say things like, ‘I’M GONNA GET 8A’S FOR PMR AND TAKE OVER THE WORLD!’.

No one sleeps in my room, as everyone is in Japan. My bed is gathering dust. I took the glow-in-the-dark stars down a while ago, and I didn’t bring my Harry Potter books to college because Arif wanted them. I have a loooong list of unread books, anyway.

We only had about two or three French lessons, girl. Setakat ‘bonjour’ dengan ‘au revoir’ aku tahu lah. Thank you Allah, since I am not a beggar or a drug addict or a smoker or a murderer or a rapist or a terrorist.

4. Do I have a driver’s license?

Believe me, I tried my absolute best. You have no idea how much sweat, blood, tears, and money I put into trying to get a driver’s license. Tapi takde rezeki. I failed twice. But it’s okay, I can survive without a car. You’re not supposed to bring your own transport during your first semester anyway. Did you know buses and trains and taxis actually exist in Malaysia? Oh, and some seniors are kind enough to regularly give me rides on their motorcycles.

I will try again to get a license in the future, InsyaAllah.

5. How is my love life?

HAHAHAHAHA. How about, hmm, non-existent? I have friends who are married and pregnant. Grandma actually told me to get a boyfriend. Oh God.

For now I have a lot of things to focus on, including improving my own self as a character, because as stated in the Qur’an, evil women are for evil men, and evil men are for evil women, while good women are for good men, and good men are for good women.

6. Are you working on your dreams?

Don’t worry, I will never give up on writing. I’m planning on penning down a manuscript during my semester break (I plan to go to Japan, heh) because I finally found a decent publishing house.

I am not really sure how to articulate my dreams for the future. I hope to get a Bachelor’s degree in Advertising. And then, I just want to be a creative genius. A writer, an artist, a designer, a photographer, a filmmaker, a director, perhaps a public figure – and through all of that I hope to spread dakwah.

7. Any other things you should know?

I am actually too lazy to answer this question. Lulz. Wait. OH YEAH!!! PHINEAS AND ISABELLA GOT TOGETHER AT LAST!!!


Yes, yes, happy 18th birthday to me! I am a free elf! But you know what, I used to think that freedom was something you get all at once, like a novel you finish reading in a few hours. Truth is, you get more and more freedom periodically. It’s like fanfiction – you have to wait loyally for the author to complete and release the next chapter.

Alhamdulillah, Allah is Most Merciful and still gives me the chance to live. I don’t need tangible gifts (though that would be nice), I would just like everyone’s du’aa that I use my youth wisely, die in a state of husnul khatimah, and that I will live forever in Jannah with my loved ones.


Arifah of 29th August 2015

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Creating contentment.

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